There seems to be a lot of talk about power moves in the office lately and since I am the only one who truly has any sort of meaningful or remotely legitimate experience in an office, I decided to weigh in. And by meaningful or remotely legitimate, I mean "none." But that's neither here nor there.
Yes, late night emails and holding the elevator are all dandy, but we are passing over the most important power move of all: the audible fart. Nothing screams scrotal fortitude like ripping some wet, smelly, robust anal emission and then silently challenging the peons beneath you to question who dropped ass. The true pro will exude such confidence in his gas-passing that it would be a sin to even scrunch your nose in disgust.
Honorable mention includes taking a massive shit in the bathroom when at least 3 other coworkers are using the facility. Bonus points if the smell lingers into the hallway for all to enjoy.
Monday, June 16, 2008
JC Weighs In
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1 comment:
Here's a little tip I learned from LBJ.
Call your underlings into the bathroom and give them orders while you take a shit. Obviously, you have to already have a certain amount of powerplayer status, but it will drastically improve your power status.
Careful though, don't get yourself fired.
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