recent findings in a gentrified neighborhood

Observation:

The Echo Tap is a public house located near the Badger Bus depot. There is a bench near the front entrance which is frequently populated by the homeless/the homeless-looking. The bar seems to thrive during all hours - including the late morning. There are a large number of middle aged persons stumbling in, out, and near the establishment.

Hypothesis:

Based on the outward appearance of the public house, it can be inferred that the place is sketchy as fuck and is probably best avoided.

Experiment:

Two subjects, Slider (Subject A.qW) and j.patrick (Subject 42), consumed two alcoholic beverages at the dwelling of Subject 42. After consumption, the subjects walked approximately 40 paces to the site of the experiment.

Upon entering, subjects requested an alcoholic beverage from a bar tend. The subjects explored the area and discovered a pool table and dart boards on the second floor of the establishment. During the two hour experiment, the subjects played several games of pool and purchased additional beverages.

Discussion:

The interior was much different than what the exterior appearance would dictate. During the experiment, the subjects were adequately entertained and intoxicated.

Conclusion:

The hypothesis fails. The Echo Tap is the new Old Fashioned.

Hey Joe

Look.

I'M BUGGIN OUT

BAHHHHHH HALLOWEEEEEN AAAHAHARRGGHGHHHHH BOOOOOOOZZZZEEEEEEE.
Dance Party Friday + Halloween + Caption Contest = least coherent post ever.

Also, check out my office:

I really like it, I'm listening to Bob Marley right now.

I've always felt that I would be more productive if I had me standing over my shoulder:

The Boys Were Feeling Good About Their Liquor Run

So as many of you already know, my life partner is in Houston for a conference all week. My life partner worries that I may be unable to fend for myself in terms of food so we went grocery shopping together late last week. We spent about $30 at Trader Joe's on some grocery type items (I think mainly frozen pizza and cereal).

You see... I had a higher purpose for my fridge this week. Behold and rejoice.


(From Left to Right: Amber, Island Wheat, Maibock, Blonde Dopplebock, Bavarian Lager, Munich Dark)


That's 2.5 cases or 10 6-packs or 60 longnecks. This is internet porn I can get behind.

Lord, Maybe I'm Not So Discouraged

I love massive nights. I probably love them more than the next guy. But I hate the feeling I get when they're over.

Do you remember back when you were young and you'd have some friends over for a sleepover? You'd probably try to stay up as late as you could, drink tons of soda, eat candy, watch movies, and play video games. I loved doing that. But the next morning, I'd feel utterly empty.

I've never been able to shake this feeling, regardless of what precedes it. In high school, I'd feel like that after big parties, football games, or dances. During college, it followed massive nights, house parties, birthday celebrations, and weekend excursions of epic proportions... often accompanied by an day long hangover. It's especially bad at critical life junctures, graduations, marriage, etc.

I had a massive weekend. A day long bachelor party left me sore, bruised, dehydrated, and sweaty. The drinking that followed left me exhausted (though, oddly enough, not hungover). I had a day of rest, followed by the best concert I can remember (and of course, drinking). But today when I got up I had no ambition, no drive to get up.

I envy people that can live even-keeled. Those people who can experience the best parts of life without feeling empty and hollow the next day. I'll never be one of those people. I'm doomed to live in boredom until that next massive night.

Those other people, they'll adjust well to a mundane existence as lawyers and government employees living out in the suburbs. They'll be content with their daily routine, maybe having a barbecue on the weekends or vacationing in Florida or the Rocky Mountains with their 2.5 kids and dog.

Maybe my pseudo-bipolar isn't so bad after all. Boredom and restlessness suck, but it makes the good times seem all that much better. I think I'd rather live in black and white than gray. I guess I have to stay positive.

Some Apologies and Requests for Clarification

Hi World, I just want to apologize for drinking all your alcohol last night. I don't think there's any left.

Also, Grebutron, sorry about breaking your glass during that overzealous cheers. I feel that maybe that was a pretty GOL move.

Could someone please clear up the following? WTF did I eat? Because it pretty much looked like lawn clippings. Also, what happened to Willips Bittycook an Jeremy? Was I the only person that drank too much? Why did we go to State Street Bar?

Daytime TV sucks without infomercials. Pukey McSlutface, out.

Ozaukee County Didn't Seem Tired Last Night

I spent most of yesterday celebrating the union of man and woman out in Ozaukee County. Let me just say, Ozaukee County, I drink to you. It was quite possibly the most interesting wedding I have ever been to.

I had heard that the bride and groom were fairly religious and that having the ceremony in the Lutheran church was a pretty big deal. I was not prepared, however, for the incredibly conservative/traditional ceremony that followed. The pastor made a point of telling the woman that she has to be submissive and obedient and that the man is the spiritual leader, etc. This sort of religiously-sponsored patriocentricity makes the Hulk angry.

The reception was held at what I can only assume is Ozaukee County's version of the Essen Haus. It was a fuck of a lot cooler though. The thing that threw me off about this wedding and made it so interesting is that, for all the religiosity that I heard (I conversed with some evangelical types during dinner), there was a shit-ton of booze consuming. The wedding day quickly turned from an old-fashioned church ceremony to a German shitshow. It was fucking sweet.

The best man started it off with a roast of his younger brother. This was followed closely by the singing and drinking to the Schnitzelbank song. This is basically what happened:



I can't do the scene justice or explain this song properly, it's just a German song that incorporated drinking, costumes, footstamping, and shenanigans. After that, the dance broke out.

Even though I didn't get converted last night, I had to admit that the band was pretty tight. I had a bit too much fun. I lost my voice and can't talk today. OC, thanks for the good time, I fuckin owe you.

I Wish They Made RU-486 For Hangovers

Apparently booze, pizza, gyros, and cannoli don't mix well. I don't know wt fuck I was thinking last night, but om-fucking-g am I paying for it today. I haven't puked that hard since freshman year.

Worst part is, I go to shit it out, right, and I instantly feel better so I take a shower. But while I'm showering, the hot water makes me a little light headed and nauseous and I have to puke again. So now I'm puking in the same toilet that I just dropped a humongous post-camping load in which precipitates more puking.

I'm not going to comment on Grebutron's last post at this time because it would probably just be the hangover talking... more like yelling. Well, you jerks know where I'll be. It might not be your couch, but it's still a couch.